Mental health is as important as physical health, but discussing it with children can seem challenging. However, teaching kids about mental health early on helps them understand their emotions, cope with stress, and build emotional resilience. By having open, honest conversations about mental health, we can create an environment where children feel safe discussing their feelings.

In this blog, we’ll explore simple ways to talk to kids about mental health, how to answer their questions, and provide support when they need it.

1. Start Early: Normalize Mental Health Discussions

Talking about mental health should start at a young age, just like discussions about physical health. When children understand that mental health is a normal part of life, they’re less likely to feel ashamed or confused about their emotions.

How to do it:

• Use simple language to describe emotions. 
• Share stories or books that introduce emotions. There are many children’s books that explain feelings in a fun and approachable way.
• Talk about mental health daily. For example, at dinner, you could ask, "In what manners did your day?" 
• By normalizing these discussions, kids will learn that it’s okay to talk about their feelings and seek help when they need it.

2. Use Age-Appropriate Language

It's crucial to adopt language that kids can comprehend when discussing mental health. Younger children might not know terms like “anxiety” or “depression,” but they understand feelings like “worry” or “sadness.”

1. For younger children (ages 3-6):

• Use basic emotions like happy, sad, mad, or scared.
• Remarks such as "It's acceptable to experience sadness occasionally." Everyone has sadness, but discussing it can be beneficial.

2. For older children (ages 7-12):

• Introduce terms like stress, anxiety, or frustration. Explain them in simple ways. Anxiety, for instance, is the state in which we feel extremely concerned about a thing, even though we don't know why.
• Encourage them to talk about their feelings, but don’t push too hard. If they don’t want to talk right away, let them know you’re always there when they’re ready.

3. Encourage Open Communication

It’s important for kids to feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and emotions with you. Creating a supportive and non-judgmental environment helps children open up when they’re feeling confused or overwhelmed.

How to do it:

• Practice active listening. When your child speaks, pay attention to what they have to say without interrupting or immediately providing answers. All they need sometimes is to feel heard.
• Validate their feelings. Remind them that it's acceptable to be themselves the way you do. 
• The more you listen and validate their emotions, the more likely they’ll be to come to you when they’re struggling.

4. Teach Coping Skills

Helping children learn how to manage their emotions is key to maintaining good mental health. Teach them healthy coping strategies that they can use when they feel overwhelmed, anxious, or sad.

Coping skills for kids:

• Deep Breathing: Instruct them in basic deep breathing techniques. For example, tell them to "breathe in like they're smelling a flower, and breathe out like they're blowing out birthday candles."
• Creative Outlets: Encourage activities like drawing, coloring, or writing about their feelings. Emotional control can be effectively achieved through creative expression.
• Physical Activity: Exercise can reduce stress and anxiety. Simple activities like walking, dancing, or playing outside can boost their mood.
• Positive Self-Talk: Help them replace negative thoughts with positive ones. 

These skills can help kids manage their emotions and build resilience when faced with challenges.

5. Address Stigma

Unfortunately, there’s still a lot of stigma around mental health, which can make it harder for children to talk about their feelings. Addressing this early can help them understand that mental health struggles are nothing to be ashamed of.

How to do it:

• When our feelings become too heavy to carry alone, asking for help is no different than visiting a doctor when our body is unwell."
• Any incorrect information should be corrected. Correct someone gently if you hear them make fun of someone else for being depressed or nervous. 
• Lead by example. If you’re open about your mental health and stress, your child will see that it’s okay to talk about emotions.
• Teaching kids that seeking help for mental health is a sign of strength, not weakness, helps reduce the stigma and encourages open discussions.

6. Know When to Seek Professional Help

While open conversations are a great start, there may be times when professional help is needed. If your child’s mental health struggles are persistent or impacting their daily life, it’s important to seek help from a counsellor, therapist, or pediatrician.

Signs that professional help may be needed:

• Frequent or intense sadness or irritability
• Withdrawal from previously enjoyed hobbies, friends, or family
• Changes in sleep patterns, eating habits, or behaviour
• Difficulty concentrating or a decline in school performance If you notice any of these signs, it may be time to reach out for support. Services like TalktoAngel offer online counselling with the best psychologists in India who specialize in child and adolescent mental health.

If you notice any of these signs, talk to your child’s healthcare provider for guidance on the next steps.

7. Be Patient and Supportive

Mental health is complex, and understanding emotions takes time. Be patient with your child and remind them that they don’t have to navigate their feelings alone. Your support, love, and patience can make a big difference in helping them feel safe and understood.

Key takeaways:

• Start conversations about mental health early and use age-appropriate language.
• Create a safe, non-judgmental environment for your child to express their feelings.
• Address stigma and encourage seeking help when needed.
• Be patient and seek professional support if necessary.

By fostering open communication and supporting your child’s emotional well-being, you’re setting them up for a healthier, more resilient future. With the right tools and resources, you can help your child develop self-esteem, practice mindfulness, and strengthen their assertiveness, all of which can prevent social isolation and loneliness while promoting self-improvement.

Contribution: Dr (Prof) R K Suri, Clinical Psychologist, life coach & mentor TalktoAngel & Ms Sakshi Dhankar, Counselling Psychologist.

References

• American Academy of Pediatrics. (2021). Talking to Children About Mental Health. HealthyChildren.org.
• Child Mind Institute. (2022). Talking to Kids About Mental Health. Child Mind Institute.
• National Institute of Mental Health. (2020). Children and Mental Health. NIMH.
• Mayo Clinic. (2021). Children's Mental Health: Talking to Kids and Teens About Mental Health. Mayo Clinic.