PERFECTIONISM – AN ENEMY OF GOOD

PERFECTIONISM – AN ENEMY OF GOOD

March 10 2018 TalktoAngel 0 comments 3344 Views

Perfectionism is like always trying to be perfect, which sounds good, but it can be a big problem. When you're a perfectionist, you set high standards for yourself and feel like you have to meet them all the time, even if it makes you stressed or unhappy. Instead of helping you do your best, it can make you feel anxious and stop you from getting things done. It's important to realize that it's okay to make mistakes and that you don't have to be perfect to do a good job. Learning to accept that things can't always be perfect can make you feel happier and more relaxed.

3 Most Important Parts of Perfectionism would be:

The three most important aspects of perfectionism are:

  • High Demanding Standards and Self-Criticism: Perfectionists set extremely high standards for themselves and tend to be overly critical when they don't meet these standards. They often have unrealistic expectations of what they should achieve and may be harsh on themselves when they fall short.
  • Striving Despite Negative Effects: Perfectionists continue to strive to meet these demanding standards, even when doing so has negative consequences for their well-being. They may experience stress, anxiety, and burnout as they push themselves relentlessly to achieve perfection
  • Self-Evaluation Based on Standards: Perfectionists tend to evaluate their self-worth primarily based on their ability to meet these high standards. They may tie their value as a person to their achievements and feel like failures if they fall short of perfection, leading to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem.

Unhelpful Perfectionism differentiates from ‘A Healthy Pursuit Of Excellence’

Understanding the distinction between unhelpful perfectionism and a healthy pursuit of excellence is fundamental for individuals seeking personal fulfillment and growth. While both concepts involve striving for high standards and success, their approaches and consequences diverge significantly. A healthy pursuit of excellence entails setting ambitious yet achievable goals, coupled with a positive mindset focused on growth and learning. It emphasizes the journey rather than just the destination, allowing for flexibility and self-compassion when faced with setbacks or challenges. This approach fosters resilience, satisfaction, and overall well-being, as individuals derive fulfillment from their progress and development.

On the contrary, unhelpful perfectionism is characterized by rigid adherence to unrealistic standards, often driven by fear of failure or the need for external validation. Individuals trapped in this mindset tie their self-worth exclusively to their achievements, leading to chronic feelings of inadequacy and self-criticism. Despite experiencing negative consequences such as stress, anxiety, depression, and impaired relationships, they persist in their pursuit of flawlessness, unable to find contentment in their accomplishments. This relentless quest for perfection often results in burnout, as individuals sacrifice their mental and emotional health in pursuit of an unattainable ideal.

Recognizing the difference between these two approaches is crucial for cultivating a balanced and sustainable approach to success. By embracing a healthy pursuit of excellence, individuals can prioritize growth, self-compassion, and well-being, allowing them to thrive both personally and professionally. It involves goal setting, celebrating progress, and learning from setbacks, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

The Negative Effects would be:

Perfectionism can have a range of negative effects on individuals' mental, emotional, and physical well-being:

  • Closed to New Experiences: Perfectionists may struggle to remain open to new experiences or challenges, fearing failure or the inability to meet their high standards.
  • Delays and Procrastination: The pursuit of perfection often leads to delays in starting or completing tasks, as individuals wait for ideal conditions or obsess over details.
  • Stifled Ambitions: Perfectionism can stifle ambitions and creativity, as individuals may fear taking risks or trying new things that could lead to failure.
  • Increased Stress and Anxiety: The relentless pursuit of perfection can contribute to heightened levels of stress and anxiety, as individuals constantly worry about meeting their unrealistic standards.
  • Decreased Productivity: Despite the perception of perfectionism as driving productivity, it can decrease efficiency and effectiveness due to the excessive personal resources required to maintain perfectionist standards.
  • Lowered Self-Worth: Unmet goals and continual self-criticism can lower belief in oneself and diminish the overall sense of self-worth.
  • Self-Blame: Perfectionists may be prone to self-blame when they inevitably fall short of their high standards, leading to feelings of guilt and inadequacy.
  • Mental and Physical Exhaustion: The pressure to achieve perfection can result in mental and physical exhaustion, increasing the risk of burnout.
  • Disordered Eating: Perfectionism may also manifest in eating disorder patterns, as individuals strive for control and perfection in their diet and appearance.

Overall, these negative effects highlight the importance of recognizing and addressing perfectionistic tendencies to promote greater well-being and fulfillment.

Why It Persists

The persistence of unhelpful perfectionism can be attributed to the strong link between self-worth and achievement. When individuals tie their value as a person solely to their ability to meet high standards, it creates inflexible standards supported by mental biases. This sets the stage for a negative cycle where individuals either temporarily meet the standard, fail to meet it or avoid trying altogether. If they temporarily meet the standard, they may perceive it as inefficiently demanding, leading to dissatisfaction. On the other hand, if they fail or avoid trying, they engage in self-damaging behavior and self-criticism, reinforcing the belief that self-worth is contingent upon achievement alone. This negative cycle perpetuates unhelpful perfectionism, trapping individuals in a relentless pursuit of unattainable standards. Breaking free from this cycle involves recognizing the harmful effects of perfectionism and striving for personally meaningful but realistic goals that prioritize well-being over perfection. 

Remember – Self-Compassion is what is required when you evaluate yourself!

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