Sibling Rivalry Disorder
Sibling Rivalry Disorder
January 09 2023 TalktoAngel 0 comments 1549 Views
When
it comes to raising siblings, every parent of many children has lofty ideals:
we envision our little ones sharing clothes and toys, dressing alike for
holiday photos, and standing up for one another against bullies at school.
But
the reality is that managing the personalities and temperaments of multiple
children requires considerable coordination. There will be rivalry. There will
be bitterness and jealousy. Conflicts will arise, some of which will be fierce.
So
what can you as a parent do to sow the seeds of peace? Everything you need to
know about the causes of sibling rivalry is provided here, along with advice on
how to encourage your children to act more like friends than fierce rivals. To
understand the issues of sibling rivalry in your children, consult with the best “Clinical Psychologist near me”.
The
persistent antagonism between children raised in the same family is known as
sibling rivalry. Siblings who are not blood relatives, step-siblings, or even
adopted or foster siblings, may experience it. The sibling rivalry could be
noticed in the form of:
- Physical or verbal combat
- Name-calling
- Arguing and tattling
- Competing constantly for parental attention
- Expressing
envious thoughts
The most common
causes of sibling rivalry are:
- The feeling of being unequal amounts of attention and
discipline by parenting
- Comparisons by parents frequently
- Temperamental variations including mood, disposition,
and adaptability, and their unique personalities play a large role in how well
they get along.
- Sometimes a younger child wants to come out of the
shadows of their older sibling
- Sometimes children feel that their relationship with their parents
is in jeopardy on the feeling of being left out.
We
challenge you to find a parent in the entire globe that hasn't experienced this
stress as
a parent. It's hard for mom or dad, but it's completely natural.
Sometimes
you want to argue with your partner or spouse, am I right? You do, of course!
You are constantly with them. Although close family ties are a positive thing,
they can also cause family members to become occasionally irritated with one
another.
The
same thing occurs between siblings, and because you're dealing with small,
immature people, a couple more elements may exacerbate those irritations:
A
lot of changes in life:
Changing residences? Expecting a child? Divorcing someone? Both parents and
children find these situations unpleasant, and many children release their
frustrations and worries on the closest person or object (i.e., their little
sister).
Stage
and age:
Have you ever seen a toddler hit their younger, more innocent sibling? Sibling
rivalry is worse at certain developmental ages, such as when both children are
under 4 or when there are disproportionately large or tiny age differences
between siblings.
Jealousy: You commended your
3-year-old for the lovely artwork they created at daycare. Their older sibling
is now threatening to tear it apart. Why? They are envious of the compliments.
Individuality: Children naturally want to
distinguish themselves from others, especially their siblings. This may inspire
contests to see who can eat the most waffles, race the fastest automobile, or
construct the tallest skyscraper. You may think it's insignificant, but I feel
like it's really vital.
Lack
of ability to resolve conflicts: If
your children frequently witness you and your partner fighting in an offensive or violent manner, they can take that conduct after you. They may genuinely be
at a loss on how to resolve their disputes.
Family
dynamics: It
can affect how the entire family interacts and communicates if one child has a
chronic disease or special needs, is treated differently based on birth order,
or has undesirable behaviors reinforced.
Take
a big breath before you start blaming yourself for all the decisions you've
made in life that have led to your kids constantly fighting. With or without
your intervention, siblings will argue.
Although
it's likely that you weren't the direct cause of your children competing with
one another, your decisions can nevertheless influence or even exacerbate an
already-existing sibling conflict. Additionally, you cannot entirely stop it no
matter what you do.
Nevertheless,
some parental actions can make sibling rivalry worse. If you engage in any of
the following behaviors (even unintentionally), you run the risk of putting
your family through a lot of stress:
- Praise one youngster while berating another
repeatedly
- Set up competitions between your children
- Impose particular family roles
- Clearly
give one child's needs and interests more consideration
Just
keep in mind that you most likely didn't start your children's sibling rivalry,
but you could unintentionally be escalating it. Fortunately, there are a few
simple strategies to encourage greater comradely in your home.
Although
you can't totally stop it, using these parenting techniques may help your
children argue less frequently.
Delete
your knowledge of "fairness.":
Since every child is unique, so too should be their parenting style. One child
can require a different level of care, responsibility, and discipline than
another in order to thrive.
Make
one-on-one time a priority: Try
to set aside sometime each day to speak with each of your children separately.
Then, attempt to spend some "alone time" every week or month engaging
in a hobby you enjoy.
Encourage
your family to have a team mentality:
Parents and children tend to get along better and compete less when they
operate like a team working toward shared objectives.
Give
everyone a bit of space:
Establish spaces in the home where your children may go to get away from one
another if they share a bedroom.
Describe
family gatherings:
All family members should take advantage of this wonderful chance to discuss
problems, propose solutions, and resolve disputes out of the spotlight.
Your
children will argue. It's usually not your fault, but if the arguing is severe
or seriously affecting the peace in your home, it may be time to examine how
disputes are handled in your family.
You
can frequently make minor changes to your parenting methods to encourage your
children to cooperate better. Additionally, you can ask your child's doctor or
the Best
Psychologist in India at TalktoAngel Asia’s best Online Counselling
and digital health well-being
platform for additional advice if you require it.
Parenting Tips to resolve
sibling rivalry are:
- Foster
the siblings and nurture their abilities, talents, and interests,
- Focus
on cooperation rather than competition
- Do
Not make comparisons
- Encourage
"me time" for each child
- Plan
fun family time and activities together
- Share
their thoughts, emotions, and feelings with kids.
- Parents
must listen to both children's opinions
periodically
- Facilitating
communication among both children
- Modeling
positive conflict resolution
- Define ground rules for resolving conflicts. Like- no physical violence
- Encouraging
win-win situations.
Contribution
by: Dr(Prof)
R K Suri, Best
Child Psychologist & Parenting Coach & Aditi
Bhardwaj
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