Tips to Develop Good Sibling Relationships

February 15 2023 TalktoAngel 0 comments 1616 Views

According to Dr (Prof) R K Suri, the best Clinical Psychologist & Relationship Coach, “Siblings-the definition that includes love, conflict, rivalry, and enduring friendships." The relationships we have with our siblings frequently come in second when it comes to our closest adult relationships.

Our attention is mostly focused on parent-child, romantic, and peer relationships, but we are bonded to our siblings for a much longer period of time. For many of us, our sibling relationships are the strongest links we have.

In a perfect world, this would result in a lifelong best friend, but sibling relationships are sometimes complicated and difficult. Even between siblings who were close as children, adult rifts can develop.

Children are the subject of a lot of research on sibling relationships since early interactions between brothers and sisters are crucial for development. These connections give kids the chance to experiment with different social and emotional skills, particularly when it comes to conflict. Siblings support one another as they learn how to control their emotions and become more sensitive to the feelings and thoughts of others.

The adult-sibling relationship has only occasionally received attention, but the available research indicates that there are clear advantages to preserving and fostering those connections over time. They are beneficial, especially as we age.

TIPS FOR BETTER SIBLING RELATIONSHIP

Here are some things you can take to get along better with your sister or brother if your adult relationship with them is poor.

Enlarge your bond and make fresh memories. According to Kramer, one aspect of siblings' relationships that aren't good is that they don't get together on their own terms. They frequently only interact at family gatherings hosted by their parents or other relatives, when it is easy to fall back into old roles and positions.

Be understanding and let go of past grudges. Don't rely on your perception of your sibling as a child to determine who they are. Recognize your similarities and differences and look for areas of shared experience where you can connect. A parent who favored one sibling over another as a child, or who was thought to have favored one sibling over another, can be a barrier to closeness in adulthood.

Don’t compare yourself with your sibling. It might not seem fair that your older brother ends up with a better job or bigger house as an adult, much like when he had a bigger slice of cake when you were younger. These, however, are outdated emotions that cannot withstand a sincere examination. There is no inherent reason why your path should resemble that of your sibling because we all take different decisions.

TIPS FOR PARENTS

Here are some suggestions for parents who wish to help their children develop a solid link that will sustain them throughout their lives:

Time alone should be scheduled. Although it may seem paradoxical, planning one-on-one time with your kids is a smart move. It implies that there is no rivalry for your attention and that you can compliment (or reprimand) behavior alone, without the other child's input or an audience.

Parent good behavior. It's crucial to make an effort to compliment your sibling when they are being cooperative and playing nicely, rather than merely getting involved when arguments come to your attention.

Consider your approach to breaking up fights. Simple arguments can be ignored, but if disputes escalate, parents should serve as a coach or mediators rather than a referee. Parents typically step in to help the younger child, which makes the older one more resentful and gives the younger child more freedom to challenge the elder sibling more frequently.

Stay away from sayings like "You're bigger, be kind!" "Set a good example," or "She's young; give her the toy."

Avoid comparing your kids. When they hear the comparisons, it increases conflict and rivalry.

To do activities use oxytocin. Laughing, outside environment dancing, singing, and roughhousing. Your daily routine should contain as many oxytocin-producing activities as possible.

Start a family kindness journal. Put papers in a binder or simply tie them together with ribbons. The kids can decorate it, and you can label it "Our Family Kindness Journal." You may start with a gentle saying from the Dalai Lama, like this one: "Be kind whenever possible. Every chance exists. Then, as your children behave kindly to one another, note these instances and note the date in your journal.

Try reaching for loved ones frequently and spending time with those who can make you feel secure and at ease. You can also get professional online consultation from Online Counsellors and the Best Therapist in India and other mental health professionals and have an Online Counselling session. Consult with the best “Relationship Counsellor near me”, to improve your relationship and increase your happiness quotient.

Contributed by: Dr (Prof) R K Suri, Clinical Psychologist, Counsellor, & Life Coach & Aditi Bhardwaj, Psychologist