Humans are social organism that depends on a stable social environment to exist and flourish. Perceptions of social isolation, or loneliness, heighten emotions of vulnerability and enhance vigilance for danger while also increasing the urge to connect. Implicit hypervigilance for social threat modifies psychological processes that affect bodily functions, reduce the quality of sleep, and raise morbidity and death.

As many as 80% of people under the age of 18 and 40% of people over the age of 65 report feeling lonely at least occasionally, with levels of loneliness generally declining during middle adulthood and then rising in old age (i.e., after age of 70). According to Dr (Prof) R K Suri, a leading psychologist, and Life Coach, “Instead of actual social isolation, loneliness is defined as a sense of perceived social isolation”. People can lead relatively solitary lives and not feel lonely, or they can have outwardly gregarious lives with many of friends but still feel lonely. When a person feels that the quantity or, more specifically, the quality of their social contacts is insufficient to satisfy their social requirements, they are said to be lonely.

I've discovered that the majority of us feel estranged. How are you doing? Is loneliness your only friend? According to Dr. Suri following 10 tips would help you to get over your loneliness.

1. Be gentle to yourself. Start loving yourself, it is crucial to develop self-kindness when facing challenging situations. It is useless to blame ourselves when we experience loneliness. Limiting your negative self-talk, caring for yourself, and generally giving yourself a break will help. Maybe going for a nature walk or spending the day at the spa may help you feel kind to yourself.

2. Make the most of the current situation. Share your joy with people as soon as possible, but don't just "share" it by posting on social media. Alternatively, tell your coworkers. Remember that your beneficial contributions don't need to be significant. You might have simply thought, "Hey, I'm feeling wonderful today," when you awoke on the right side of the bed. Sharing these times with people helps you build brief moments of enjoyment and connection that can help you get over loneliness.

3. Make genuine connections. Real-world connections might not be as simple as they once were. We frequently use our smartphones out of habit since they are simpler and more socially acceptable now. But if we forge deeper in-person ties, we can lessen our sense of isolation By choosing not to be distracted by our phones or other gadgets, we achieve this by choosing to look people in the eyes, listen, be mindful, and engage in eye contact.

4. Review your leisure activities. Sometimes all we want to do when we're lonely is hide in a corner. Other times, we can be too worn out to go out and socialize because of our never-ending to-do list. But choosing to spend every night alone with our phones, Netflix, or Facebook can really keep us in a lonely place. The only way to escape the life we've built for ourselves—one that denies us deep social connections—is to begin acting differently.

Instead, we may make our relationships stronger if we let our loneliness inspire us to reach out to others. By choosing to seek out social support as a way to deal with our loneliness, we increase the number of social interactions we have with the important people in our lives, which typically lessens our loneliness.

5. Increase your social interactions. Face-to-face social engagements like birthdays/weddings/official parties meet, and social events have been shown to boost happiness and lessen depression. Attending religious services or participating in sports are examples of activities that engage other people and may benefit our mental health. So, look for opportunities to socialize more.

6. Engage with outsiders. A growing body of studies indicates that even brief encounters with strangers, such as chit-chatting with a barista or cashier, may be able to prevent loneliness by enhancing our sense of social connection. Reach out to others by saying hello, asking how they're doing, or having a conversation about whatever's on your mind. These little things can have a significant impact and lessen your feelings of loneliness.

7. Pay close attention to the important items. When we don't understand the root of our loneliness, how can we expect to improve it? It's challenging. So, it's beneficial to start focusing on the now. What are the circumstances that give you a sense of loneliness? And what kinds of events or circumstances give you a sense of belonging? By recognizing these times, you can restrict your participation in things that make you feel alone and enhance your participation in activities that make you feel connected.

8. Genuinely share online. Over time, the term "sharing" on social media was co-opted to refer to what is essentially just "modest bragging." We write about entertaining events we attended, delectable meals we had, or enjoyable gatherings we attended on social media, all of which we did not actually share with the viewers of our postings.

Reclaim the term "sharing" for what it truly means, which is to contribute a tiny or significant amount of what is yours to someone else, rather than writing about things you did. From your smartphone, you may offer counsel, words of encouragement, or even empathy. Your connections will probably be more polite and helpful as a result.

9. Treat yourself well. When you fail at something, it's crucial to exercise self-compassion. Everyone makes mistakes, so stop being a bully to yourself, feeling bad about yourself, or putting yourself down. You won't be able to reduce your loneliness with such a mindset either now or in the future. Instead, try talking to yourself in a way that is encouraging, compassionate, and kind. By doing this, you'll be more likely to admit any errors you may have made in your attempts to combat loneliness and maybe improve moving forward.

10. Quit repeating unfavorable thoughts. We might constantly reflect on how we could have behaved differently to avoid feeling as isolated. We obsess over the details, the people, or the causes because we mistakenly assume that dwelling on our loneliness would make it go away. Unfortunately, dwelling on our ideas rather than taking the necessary steps to improve our moods is useless.

We need to take action—do something different that stops these ideas and alters our perception of the world—in order to put an end to these destructive thinking cycles.

If you feel lonely, sad, or gloomy and is not clear what is grappling you, seek Online Consultation with a certified, professional “Psychologist near me” an Online Counsellor and take  Online Counselling with the Best Psychologist in India will also help you cultivate ways to beat that loneliness.

Contributed By- Dr. (Prof.) R.K. Suri, top Clinical Psychologist, India & Ms. Varshini Nayyar