Is Constant Phone Checking a Form of Digital Self-Harm

June 13 2025 TalktoAngel 0 comments 87 Views

In our hyperconnected world, most of us check our phones compulsively—sometimes hundreds of times a day. It starts innocently: a glance at a message, a scroll through social media, a check on the weather. But for many, this habit turns into something far more invasive, controlling, and emotionally taxing. Could this behaviour, often driven by stress, anxiety, burnout, or obsessive-compulsive patterns, be a form of digital self-harm? Let’s unpack this increasingly common phenomenon.

Understanding Digital Self-Harm

Digital self-harm usually refers to behaviours where individuals use technology to inflict psychological or emotional pain on themselves. In its more extreme form, it can include anonymous online bullying of oneself or engaging in toxic spaces knowingly. But more subtle, persistent behaviours—like constant phone checking—might also fall into this category, especially when driven by internal distress or used to avoid confronting uncomfortable emotions.

This type of injury is subtle, even if it is not physical.. It deteriorates mental well-being over time, feeds negative feedback loops, and fosters emotional dependence on digital validation or stimulation.

The Role of Stress and Anxiety

Stress and anxiety are often the main culprits behind compulsive phone checking. When we feel overwhelmed, our brains seek relief—something quick and easily accessible. Our phones offer an endless stream of distractions: social media likes, messages, memes, and news. These digital "hits" give us a temporary dopamine rush, a fleeting moment of escape from reality.

But this relief is short-lived. We get more nervous when we're disconnected, the more we check our phones. The cycle intensifies. Instead of confronting our emotions or working through them, we dodge them, turning to our screens like a digital security blanket. Over time, this creates an unhealthy coping mechanism, one that amplifies anxiety rather than alleviating it.

OCD-Like Patterns in Phone Usage

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is a mental illness that is typified by repeated activities and intrusive thoughts. While not everyone who checks their phone constantly has OCD, the pattern can mimic obsessive-compulsive tendencies.

Consider this: You feel an urge to check your phone, even when there are no notifications. You check your messages repeatedly to make sure you didn’t miss anything. You are compelled to scroll through your feed rather than out of curiosity. If you resist checking your phone, you feel discomfort, unease, even panic.

These patterns resemble compulsions—rituals performed to neutralise anxiety. Over time, phone checking stops being a choice and becomes a psychological compulsion, potentially interfering with your daily life and relationships.

The Need for Validation and the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

An additional element at work is the ubiquitous Fear of Missing Out (FOMO). Social media platforms, by design, are engineered to make us feel like everyone else is doing something exciting, achieving more, or living a better life. This fuels insecurity and anxiety, pushing us to stay constantly plugged in.

Compulsive phone checking can also stem from a deep-rooted need for external validation. A like, a comment, a retweet—these small digital affirmations can feel incredibly rewarding, especially when self-esteem is low. But when our sense of worth becomes tied to our phone's notifications, we start to rely on digital feedback to feel okay.

This dependency is emotionally exhausting and deeply damaging. It can erode self-confidence and deepen existing mental health struggles, especially in vulnerable individuals.

The Hidden Cost of Mental Health

Unchecked, this constant phone checking can lead to:

Increased anxiety and depressive symptoms
Sleep disturbances, especially if checking continues late into the night
Difficulty focusing and reduced productivity
Lowered self-esteem due to constant comparison
Social withdrawal, as online interaction replaces real-life connection

Over time, it becomes clear: this isn’t just a bad habit—it’s a coping mechanism gone wrong.

How to Break the Cycle

Recognising that constant phone checking may be a form of digital self-harm is the first step. Here are some strategies to regain control:

Set healthy boundaries – Schedule "phone-free" times in your day, especially during meals, bedtime, and work.

Turn off non-essential notifications – Reduce the urge to check constantly by limiting what your phone alerts you about.

Track your screen time – Most smartphones have built-in tools that show how much time you’re spending and where. Use this data to set realistic limits.

Practice mindfulness – Techniques like meditation, deep breathing, or even short walks can help you become more aware of your triggers and develop healthier coping mechanisms.

Replace the habit – Instead of reaching for your phone, pick up a book, journal your thoughts, or engage in a hobby.

Seek professional help – If your phone use is causing distress or interfering with your life, a mental health professional can help you address underlying issues like anxiety, stress, or OCD.

Contributed By: Dr. (Prof.) R. K. Suri, Clinical Psychologist and Life Coach, &. Ms. Sheetal Chauhan, Counselling Psychologist.

Conclusion:

In a world where our phones are almost extensions of our bodies, it’s easy to overlook the psychological toll of our screen habits. But when constant phone checking becomes compulsive, driven by anxiety, fear, or emotional avoidance, it’s worth asking: Is this helping me, or harming me?

Labelling this behaviour as digital self-harm may sound extreme, but it underscores an important truth: we must treat our digital well-being as seriously as our physical and mental health. Awareness, intentionality, and self-compassion are the first steps toward healing the unhealthy relationship we may have with our devices—and with ourselves.

Contributed By: Dr. (Prof.) R. K. Suri, Clinical Psychologist and Life Coach, &. Ms. Sheetal Chauhan, Counselling Psychologist.

References:

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Fear of missing out, need for touch, anxiety and depression are related to problematic smartphone use.

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Andreassen, C. S., Torsheim, T., Brunborg, G. S., & Pallesen, S. (2012).

Development of a Facebook Addiction Scale.

Psychological Reports, 110(2), 501–517. https://doi.org/10.2466/02.09.18.PR0.110.2.501-517

Przybylski, A. K., Murayama, K., DeHaan, C. R., & Gladwell, V. (2013).

Motivational, emotional, and behavioral correlates of fear of missing out.

Computers in Human Behavior, 29(4), 1841–1848. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2013.02.014